A Scotsman, an Irishman and a Chinese man are hired at a building site. The foreman points out a huge pile of sand and stack of cement sacks. And says to the Irishman, You're in charge of shovelling" To the Scotsman, "You're in charge of mixing" To the Chinese man, "And you're in charge of supplies." The foreman then tells them "I have to go to the other side of the site, “while I'm away make some concrete,” The foreman returns a couple of hours later, the sand and cement are untouched. The foreman asks the Irishman "Why haven't you shovelled anything?" The Irishman replies, "I couldn't get myself a shovel. You left the Chinese fella in charge of supplies, but I couldn't find him." He says to the Scotsman, "Why didn't you do any mixing?" The Scotsman replies, "I couldn't get a mixer. You left the Chinese chap in charge of supplies, but I couldn't find him." The foreman is really fed up and storms off towards the pile of sand and cement looking for the Chinese man. Just then, the Chinese man jumps out from behind the stack of cement and shouts “SUPPLIES!”
Adam was walking around the Garden of Eden feeling very
lonely, so God asked him, "What is wrong with you?" Adam said he
didn't have anyone to talk to. God said he was going to give him a companion
and it would be a woman. He said, "This person will cook for you and wash
your clothes; she will always agree with every decision you make. She will bear
your children and never ask you to get up in the middle of the night to take
care of them. She will not nag you, and will always be the first to admit she
was wrong when you've had a disagreement. She will never have a headache, and
will freely give you love and compassion whenever needed."
Adam asked God: "What will a woman like this cost?" God said,
"arm and a leg."
Adam said, "What can I get for just a rib?” The rest is history.
There once was a young woman
who went to confession. Upon entering the confessional she said, "Forgive
me Father, for I have sinned." The priest said, "Confess your sins
and be forgiven." The young woman
said, "Last night my boyfriend made mad passionate love to me seven
times." The priest thought long and hard and then said, "Take seven
lemons and squeeze them into a glass and then drink the juice. The young woman
asked, "Will this cleanse me of my sins?" "No, but it will wipe
that smile off of your face."
Arnold Schwarzenegger has a big
one.
Michael J. Fox has a small one.
Madonna doesn't have one.
The Pope has one but doesn't use it.
The Artist Formerly Known as Prince won't admit that he has one.
Clinton uses his all the time.
What is it?
.
.
.
.
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Answer:
A LAST NAME!
What were you thinking of?